The best day of my entire elementary school career was the day I smuggled fake vomit into the cafeteria.   I couldn’t believe how real it looked.   Finely crafted from the highest quality plastic in Hong Kong and painted to grotesque perfection, it was sure to fool even the most observant school nurse.  What I had planned was going to be incredible. 

I was about to become a legend. 

I walked into the cafeteria that day, Superfriends lunchbox in hand, and could barely suppress a giggle knowing what I had tucked away inside.  My friends took forever, absolutely forever, to get through the lunch line.  I couldn’t pull the trigger until everyone had been seated.  I wanted a big audience. 

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